At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
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