Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
My cat gives me a boner
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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