come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize