The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
