White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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