She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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