i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
