I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
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