guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
