Im at strip club and am horny
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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