Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
