My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
