Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
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