You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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