Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
