Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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