I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
