8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
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