DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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