I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Randomize
