He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
