i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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