omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
