so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
