i barfeds in our rink
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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