ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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