he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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