Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
