So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
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