69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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