I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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