normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
