If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Randomize
