their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
