Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
