you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
