sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize