I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
