yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
