he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
