when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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