okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Randomize
