new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
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