New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
