The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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