I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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