I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Randomize
