matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize