Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
