I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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