Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize