The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
